I’m sitting here, reflecting on the journey that has been my life with bipolar disorder. It’s hard to believe it’s been over 7 years since the beginning and the first time I received my diagnosis. It feels like yesterday I was navigating the unknown. Trying every day to make sense of the emotions and thoughts that were swirling inside my head. As I start this blog, I figured what better place to begin than at the beginning of my bipolar journey.
For me, the beginning of this journey started in 2018, a year that would change my life forever. I remember feeling like something was off, like a switch had flipped. That I began living in a different reality. The darkness that had been lurking in the shadows finally emerged. Being faced with the harsh reality of my own mental health.
Before & After
Before 2018, I had struggled with depression and anxiety for years, but I had always managed. I thought I was doing okay, that I was coping with my emotions and living a normal life. But looking back, I realize that I was holding on. The anxiety was suffocating, the depression debilitating, and I was trying to survive.
But 2018 was different. The emotions that had been simmering beneath the surface finally boiled over. I found myself in a place of complete chaos. I got admitted to an inpatient mental health facility not once, not twice, but three times that year. The first stay was the longest, and it’s a period of my life that’s still a bit of a blur.
I don’t remember much of my time in the hospital, thanks to the fog of my own mind. What I remember is the kind staff, the nice nurses, and the understanding doctor. They saw me at my worst, and yet they still managed to treat me with dignity and respect. I’ll never forget the way they made me feel, like I was worth saving, like I was worth fighting for.
What I Learned and Resources to Help
One of the most important things I’ve learned on this journey is the importance of a support system. I was lucky to have people in my life who cared about me, who were willing to drop everything to help me when I needed it most. They were my rock, my safe haven, and I don’t know what I would have done without them.
If you’re reading this and you’re struggling, please know that you’re not alone. It’s okay to ask for help, it’s okay to not be okay. In fact, it’s more than okay – it’s necessary. Don’t be afraid to reach out to friends, family, or a therapist. Don’t be afraid to take that first step towards healing.
For me, that first step was admitting that I needed help. It was acknowledging that I couldn’t do it on my own, that I needed someone to guide me through the darkness. And it was scary, oh so scary. But it was also liberating. It was like a weight had lifted off my shoulders, like I could finally breathe again.
A Look Back on the Beginning
As I look back on my journey, I realize that it’s been a wild ride from the beginning diagnosis. There have been ups and downs, twists and turns. There have been times when I thought I was losing my mind, when I thought I wouldn’t make it through the day. But there have also been times of great beauty, times of great joy. And it’s those times that make it all worth it.
So if you’re starting your own journey, or if you’re somewhere in the middle, I want you to know that you’re not alone. I want you to know that there is hope, that there is healing. And I want you to know that it’s okay to take it one step at a time, to take it one day at a time. Because that’s all any of us can do.
Moving Forward from the Journey Beginning
As I move forward on this journey, I’m excited to see what the future holds. I’m excited to share my story, to share my struggles and my triumphs. And I’m excited to connect with others who are on their own journey, to offer support and guidance whenever I can.
So let us take this journey together. Let’s walk through the darkness and into the light, hand in hand. Whether it is your beginning years or you’ve been battling for years. And let’s remember that we’re not alone, that we’re all in this together.
Important Information
Disclaimer: If you are experiencing a mental health emergency, please contact your local emergency number or crisis hotline immediately. Nothing mentioned in this blog is intended to be taken as medical or legal advice. The content of this blog is based on my personal experiences and should not be used as a substitute for professional advice or treatment. If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek help from a qualified mental health professional.
For support, you can explore the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) website(https://www.nami.org/). You might also find helpful information from the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA, https://www.dbsalliance.org/) website. More resources can also be found on this website by visiting https://bipolarblogging.com/resources/ and https://bipolarblogging.com/crisis.